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So you are saying stop my Divorce. Well that’s easy to say but there are a lot of factors to be considered before this can happen. What brought you to this point? What can you do to make things different? And I always look at both sides so you really need to ask yourself if this is really what you want.
Don’t get me wrong I absolutely do not advocate divorce. I advocate doing the right thing. In fact I wish more people would ask to stop my divorce. With the divorce rate hovering about 50% that tells me that divorce is too easy to get without any effort going back into the relationship.
Too many people think the relationship will be a long standing honeymoon and don’t account for what the future may hold. Bills, children, housing, job loss, security, and 100 other things that lead people to asking for help to stop my divorce. Maybe we should be saying stop my wedding if these issues are not addressed ahead of time. Maybe we need more education before allowing two people to marry.
Now I am not just saying this for an article. I have been married over 20 years and let me tell you there were times when I wondered if I would be asking someone to stop my divorce. The key is we never gave up and always talked things out. That’s the major problem in most relationships these days. There is absolutely no communication.
Before you get to the point of asking someone to stop my divorce take a long hard look at what got you there and try stopping it on your own. If I could offer one piece of advice that I think was and has been most prudent in my marriage is never go to bed angry even if it takes all night to make things right.
Debbie Mans
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/stop-my-divorce-can-i-really-do-it-750286.html
In the United States, there are statistics that indicate that half of all marriages will end up in a divorce or legal separation. Often people do not differentiate between divorce and legal separation. Both divorce and legal separation refer to the situation when a couple decides not to live together anymore. But being separated is much different than being divorced.
What does legal separation mean? Legal separation generally refers to a court order which acknowledges that a couple is no longer living together and that all the issues regarding the marriage have been resolved. A legal separation generally means that both parties reached an agreement concerning child custody, child visitation, child support, spousal support or alimony, distribution of property, attorney fees, and personal conduct. However, in a legal separation both parties remain married to each other. Indeed spouses who are just legally separated are not allowed to marry another person.
Divorce, also known as a decree of dissolution of marriage, is also a court order but it is for the purpose to dissolve or terminate a marriage. Both parties are allowed to marry another person following a divorce since they have returned to an unmarried status. An annulment differs from a divorce on the ground that this process is meant at simply canceling a marriage.
What are the benefits of a legal separation? Legal separation often takes place when both parties prefer to stay married for religious reasons. That’s why legal separation is often coined catholic legal separation since it preserves the religious marriage. Legal separation is not only pursued for religious reasons, but also for tax reasons. Unlike a divorce, the non-custodial parent may be able to deduct from his/her income taxes spousal support payments. Some also prefer not to wait for the state statutory waiting period for termination of marital status. That’s one of the reasons why a legal separation is often pursued to set the parameters for dealing with one another while living separate and apart while keeping the married status, and leaving an opportunity for a reunion or resumption of marriage. However being legally separated is not a requirement before filing a divorce. In other words, a legal separation is not a prerequisite of the dissolution of a marriage or Divorce.
If you are considering a legal separation, divorce, or dissolution of marriage you would be wise to consult an attorney who can inform you legally about your particular divorce or legal separation matter.
© 2007 Child Custody Coach
Child Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce. “How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case. Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.
Steven Carlson
http://www.articlesbase.com/divorce-articles/divorce-divorce-and-legal-separation-96010.html
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Life sure is full of twists and turns, sometimes taking us in directions we never expected to go in. In the 1960’s, when I was born, little girls were groomed to depend on men for a fulfilling family life. Learning to cook, clean and be ladylike were the norm back then. Watching Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and other lovely Disney movies, we waited for our hadsome princes to come take us away. For me, that never happened. Looking fashionable and cooking gourmet meals for men just didn’t do it for me, somehow. I kept my figure, wore high heels and pretty dresses, had my hair done every eight weeks and did the whole Stepford Wife thing (I can make a kiler batch of cookies), but felt totally unfulfilled and worn out. My husband always found things to complain about, no matter what I did. I felt unappreciated and bored in the lifestyle I thought I’d wanted all along.
Marriage in itself is a fine institution for those for whom it worked out in. In my case, my marriage was disappointing, and a lesson in self-preservation. That picture-perfect husband of mine looked like he walked off a model’s runway somewhere, but behind that dazzling, pretty face was the heart of a cold, heartless, psychotic and dangerous monster. He morphed himself into an angry, dangerous drug and alcohol addict, after spending too much time with his womanizing, drunk friends. I Divorced him after enduring a roller coaster of problems, threats and his infidelities. Enough was enough. After trying to get him help, with no success, I realized he wasn’t going to get better, and concluded that if I valued my life, I had to go and not look back. His putting a knife to my throat was the last straw. That was ten years ago.
After my marriage ended, I was in my thirties, footloose and fancy free. Going out with my other single or divorced friends, we had a lot of fun going dancing, and out to restaurants together. We met up every week in downtown Cleveland high-class watering holes, then would go out to eat afterwards. Together, we visited places like Jamaica, Mexico and other exotic travel destinations, just for fun. I even lived in Mexico for two years, which was an adventure I’ll never forget. As time went on, one by one, my friends and I all started dating new men and saw each other less often. My next boyfriend lived in another city, and I moved there to be with him later on. Big mistake.
My last relationship lasted for two years to a compulsively lying, travelling salesman who it turned out had more ex-wives then he’d told me about. During his travels, he hooked up with women, and was eventually busted later, when I found phone numbers and makeup on his shirts. He had excuses for everything, but I learned he couldn’t be trusted and left. He freaked out and stabbed my hand with a fork as I moved out. He was put in jail and I got a restraining order out against him as I moved far away and never looked back. Good riddance.
A few years later, here I am, happily single and proud of it. My life is full and complete, and I’m happier now than I ever was as a girlfriend or wife. Why is it so wonderful to be alone, you may ask? For starters, if I want to date, I can, but I can go home to my own place afterwards. No worries about making dinner every night. I can and do, eat cereal for dinner, without ridicule. Captain Crunch is my favorite. My second childhood has arrived. I have the whole bed to myself (except for my cats, who sleep on my feet). If I want to take a trip, I just grab a friend and off we go. No long lectures about how that kind of thing is frivolous. I make enough money to live well, and do what I want.
Ok, so there are a few things about being single that aren’t easy. I have to clean the cat box, take out the trash and there was nobody to help me cope with a slipped disk in my back, which left me sleeping on the floor for weeks, due to the severe pain. No situation is perfect, and it would’ve been easier to have a partner to get through these things. But, I made it through my pre-concieved list of undesirable situations, and was stronger for it, later. Before, I was more dependent on men. Now, I choose not to be. I have no idea how to fix my own car, or hang something really heavy on the wall. So, handymen and mechanics are hired to help out with those. With practise, a workable system forms, making it easier to do all sorts of activities and chores oneself.
At this point in life, I date but only a little. My world is complete and I enjoy my solitude. If I want companionship, I call up friends or play with my pets. Animals are loving and make great companions. No, I’m not a crazy cat lady. Just one who likes to do things my way, and is much more sane and happy by being free to be myself. Men ask me out here and there, I enjoy their company but tell them that I am looking for just friends. Life taught me what works best for me. I like the unconditional acceptance of my pets, the ease of working from my home office, for my job. Nobody scolds me if I didn’t do the laundry and nobody forgets our anniversary. Every year I buy myself a gift at Valentines’ Day. I have no problem with this holiday. though some single people I know, dread it. Why dread it? It’s a celebration of love. I call my parents and tell them I love them, pet my pets, and talk to friends. Maybe, I go and get a latte at Starbucks. Life is good, and who knew being single could feel so good? I now “see the light”.
Ten years ago, I’d have said that anyone who felt like this had given up on life and love. I haven’t, not at all, my priorities have changed, though. Now, I can live out sort of a combination of midlife crisis and a second childhood, by watching movies like Shrek, Harry Potter and Finding Nemo without boring and annoying my remote control-obsessed ex, who would rather watch the stock market on CNBC twenty four hours a day. I can buy a nicer car that before, seemed totally unpractical to my previous life as our budget wouldn’t allow it. On holidays, I’m not stuck visiting his fighting relatives, and can sleep in or celebrate with those I want to be with. Selfish, maybe, but for the first time in my life, it feels good to think of myself instead of putting others first.
For anyone dreading being single, remember, it’s all in your head how to react to the situation. You can be miserable and lonely, or you can get out there and enjoy your life, do what you want to do and later settle down if you choose to. Things aren’t black and white, they’re grey. Who knows what life brings us. I go with the flow, and if someone worthwhile does happen into my life at some point, after checking his criminal history, maybe I’d settle down again. But for now, I’m having too much fun being me, living life to the fullest and working hard. I’m no longer dependent on anyone and it feels great. Freedom feels good. Do whatever works best for you, but the bottom line is, live a happy life. Make whatever situation you’re in work for you, too. Life is too short to be stuck in a relationship that makes you miserable.
Carolyn McFann
http://www.articlesbase.com/women’s-issues-articles/being-a-happily-single-and-independant-woman-after-leaving-a-bad-marriage-126030.html
There are some common mistakes which men getting over Divorce often make. It can be helpful for you to keep a few important tipsin mind so that the transition can be much easier for you!
If you just read the last part of that sentence, this is the key point– it is a transition. However long or brief your divorce took from start to finish, and whether it was by mutual agreement or not, you are in the position of making the transition from married to single. While it may be painful to some degree, it does not need to be nearly as difficult as you may think.
Men getting over divorce often make the mistake of doing either of two things. Either they want to rush directly into a new relationship, or they firmly tell themselves that they will never become seriously involved with anyone ever again! If you do not make these mistakes, getting over divorce will be much smoother for you.
If you wish to make the transition successfully, you must begin by letting go of the marriage which is now over, and your former spouse. You must gain a clear perspective that they are in the past. While this can be hard if you have children to consider, even interacting with your ex for the sake of your children does not need to mean that she, personally, is still a part of your own life.
Men who are getting over divorce can do this most successfully by focusing on their own lives. If you are like most adults, there are probably many aspects of your life which can benefit from your attention– and you will benefit, also. Whether it includes a job or career, hobbies, or other personal interests, this is the best time to put all of those things first on your priority list. You can also develop some new interests which you did not have time for before now.
Although opinions on this differ, men getting over divorce should remain free of new relationships. In addition to it being essential that you have left your prior marriage in the past, your time is best spent if it is spent on yourself. If you do not grant yourself a sufficient amount of time, you could make the common mistake of becoming involved too quickly with someone else– and unconsciously expecting this new person to make up for the absence of your ex.
Men getting over divorce should allow themselves adequate time before even considering a new involvement. While it would be very unfair to a new person if you were still struggling with the after-effects of your divorce, there is yet another equally-relevant reason for putting some time into your own interests. Getting over divorce is almost never easy, but if you keep your focus on your own life before you think about having someone else in it, this can help you to gain a newfound strength, peace, and hope for your future. And when you think about it, you will surely agree that you do deserve it!
Daniel Hartman
http://www.articlesbase.com/divorce-articles/tips-for-men-getting-over-divorce-732451.html
Divorce is indeed one of the most traumatic situations that can happen in someone’s life. In other words, divorce is the end of a married life as the husband and wife separate from each other. Their relationship is in problem and so they decide to get separated. Due to some reason, they are not able to cope up with each other and thus they decide to get separated from each other. Well, marriage is one such thing through which almost every person undergoes. Marriage and divorce are two such diverse things that many people may have to face this situation. Every body gets married with the intention to lead a happy and peaceful life. No one marries with the purpose of getting divorce, but sometimes it may happen that divorce may become the last restore out of a really ugly situation in someone life. So, to deal with this kind of situation, a best divorce lawyer is one who helps the victim to get the divorce.
Divorce is really a harrowing experience of someone’s life. This is a case that definitely needs a lawyer who will assist the couples in legal matters to get separated. Best Divorce lawyer New York helps its clients in getting the decision in their favour. A Divorce lawyer is meant to represent his clients through the case in the court of law. The best divorce lawyer is well efficient to help out his client as he is well familiar with all the legal rules and laws. There are many qualified and experienced divorce lawyers in New York who work towards guiding couples willing to get divorced. Whenever there is a case of divorce, best divorce lawyer New York has to consider every step with caution as it is one of the most serious matters in case of family law.
No matters in which part of the United States the victim is residing and so one can consider any best divorce lawyer that one want .There are certain things that one needs to look into before hiring a best divorce lawyer. The lawyer must be certified so that one can believe that the lawyer is efficient enough to handle your case. One can consult another person whoever has undergone through such painful experience in their life. The victim can also look into yellow pages that help will him in finding the perfect lawyer. Today, there are online websites that provide some information regarding an efficient lawyer. One can look into the total experiences he has to handle the case very efficiently. Well, the lawyers are also very much dedicated to bring the case in the favour of his client. The experience and talent of the client does help in making him to turn the case whenever he feels.
Best divorce lawyer has to be very cautious that every point that he or she puts in front of the judge has to be supported by valid reasons so that a fair decision can be taken. Best divorce lawyer New York needs to have an idea about various situations and understanding, so that he can guide his client in a best possible manner. During the divorce session, the couples may have to go through mental pressure. The case may see a lot of problem in the matter of child custody, division of assets, deciding over the visiting time with child and others. These types of cases are sensitive issues that requires careful handling by a best divorce lawyer.
damey
http://www.articlesbase.com/law-articles/best-divorce-lawyer-new-york-helps-to-make-lawsuit-favor-of-the-client-138475.html
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